Anthony Ramos: Manifesting a Faith Journey Through Music

This week, Anthony Ramos joins Dr. Reyes for a conversation about his early years searching for direction and meaning in his life and how role models set him on a faith journey where he learned to trust God’s plan for him. Anthony uses hip-hop as a platform to share his life and faith experiences with the young adults he teaches and mentors. 

Anthony “A-Ram” Ramos is a Philadelphia native of Puerto Rican descent. He is the project director at Esperanza Inc. and an adjunct professor at Esperanza College of Eastern University.

Instagram: @a.ram_official
Twitter: @ARam_Official_

The songs from this episode, "So Close" and "Can't Deny," can be found on all streaming platforms and for sale on iTunes and Amazon.

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Transcript

Patrick: Welcome to the Sound of the Genuine. The Forum for Theological Exploration’s podcast on how religious leaders and educators find meaning and purpose in their lives. I'm Dr. Reyes and today we have Anthony Ramos who is not only a project director at Esperanza College of Eastern University, but he's a rapper, an inspiring artists and author. He has worked with countless young adults in the Philadelphia area. And I'm just so glad he's come to share his story with us on the Sound of the Genuine. 

Anthony, I'm glad you're here! Sound of the Genuine, we got you in person, in the flesh. All right, so you do a lot. You’re a parent, doing youth ministry, you're working at a college, like you do all really cool stuff.

I can't imagine you like came out the womb and said, “You know what - I'm going to be awesome when I grow up!” Tell me about where'd you grow up? Tell me about your family, your people.

Anthony: I was born in Leominster, Massachusetts, moved to Philly with my mother when I was about eight months and just was raised in Philadelphia all my life by a single mother. My grandmother was also a huge support. My father was in and out of my life. One of four children, the only boy and in terms of just like upbringing, I literally could have been a statistic, just based on like the trajectory of my life. I dropped out of school when I was 16 years old in 10th grade.

I wanted to kind of pursue what fast life looks like, like having money and having freedom and flexibility. So I had this idea that maybe I could drop out of high school, pursue my GED and then work as a jeweler. So my mom is a jeweler. She would sell jewelry and she knew someone that was hiring.

So I thought that that was going to be my profession. I really thought that that was going to be my way of, you know, making money and being known in the city as a jeweler - someone who cleans jewelry, sells jewelry, buys jewelry, and all that business. So I was doing that and I was pursuing my GED at the same time. And lo and behold, the place that I was studying to get my GED, they were handing out false GED’s. So they got closed down. I paid like 400 bucks for like two weeks and like, no GED to show for it, which was crazy. [I] never got the money back. But I was also working at the same time.

At that point I wasn't studying, but I was like, okay, I'm working. At least I'm going to be okay. You know? But I was 16, so I had a bunch of friends who just enjoyed like recreational smoking and alcohol. You know, I thought that's what I wanted to do. I was exploring that.

One day I was hung over so bad, that I didn't want to report to my job. The issue with that was that he had two locations and four employees, but I was the only one that was going to be present that day. So I had to man one of the other locations. But I called out because of how hung over I was. And this is the boss - He said if I were to call off and not show up that I pretty much shouldn't show up the next day. And so me being really naive, I thought he was giving me another day off. I'm like, okay, cool! I'll take today off and tomorrow I'll be off and then I'll go back to work and it's all good.

But later that evening, my mom came home from work and I guess this was all news in jewelers road. Oop, you got fired. You know that really hit me hard because I was 16. Obviously like my father wasn't in my life, so I really didn't like a male direction of, you know, what does it look like to be a successful male?

And I was out of school, didn't really have like a clear path in front of me of what I wanted to do because I thought being a jeweler was going to be my way out. It was just a tough place for me at that time where I wasn't doing any of that, and you know, thoughts of suicide came to mind cause I couldn't see hope. I couldn't see my life going anywhere. But fortunately like my uncle, who was in prison for about 10 years because of drug activity, he was able to kind of turn his life around while he was in prison - connect with a couple of brothers there who kind of showed him the Bible. He took it seriously and he would write to me. 

And when he got out, it was around the same time where I was trying to figure out my next steps, right. And he came alongside. He kind of took like a fatherly role in some ways, answered a lot of questions that I had in terms of faith, in terms of my responsibilities as a male in my household. Yeah, it was much needed for me. And he would take me to church and it was all Spanish speaking you know, Pentecostal, and my Spanish was pretty rough. But I had a sense that if I were to just trust God, that I literally could just offer up what I did have, which was just my fantasy with recreational drugs and like hopelessness and all those things, that he had a plan for me.

And I didn't know what it looked like. I didn't even know what following Christ looked like either. But I said, you know what, I'm going to give this a try because nothing has been working. It doesn't look like it's gonna work. And I just needed hope. A little bit later from there. I was able to connect with pastor Sonia Alvarez, who pastored a church in our neighborhood. She invited me over and just started pouring into me, started mentoring me. And that was a cool thing to like kind of like stepping back, like seeing how God utilized like women to empower me, right. It's kinda like seeing, you know, even in scripture where you see these iconic female role models, you know, who led the charge and made an impact.

And that's exactly how it was for me. Like my mother, my grandmother, pouring into me. And then pastor Sonia Alvarez, you know, mentoring me at an early age. Then she connected me with Esperanza College and then, you know, Reverend Elizabeth Conde Frazier poured into me. And it was just a journey for me while I was in college to just grow in my faith. It was kind of like an incubator for me to, you know, explore those next steps. 

Patrick: What does that look like, that transition from jeweler...getting fired by your mom - That's how I'm going to hear that. She came home, she had the news - to going to this church? Now you're in college and thinking about yeah, what is the next steps in higher education? Because I mean, you said you stopped at 16 and now you're jumping in to Esperanza, which is, you know, education. Now you're back into it. What were you dreaming? What were you hoping at that moment? 

Anthony: Yeah So so I think I left a few pieces out. So when my uncle came back in, when he came into the picture, encouraged me to get my GED along with pastor Sonia Alvarez. Got my GED from Temple University. And pastor Sonia Alvarez encouraged me to go to Esperanza College. I was just so happy that I felt like I had a reset like, you know, how dark I felt like my life was going, that I was given a new opportunity. And so I just wanted to excel. I didn't do so well the last year while I was in high school and then I obviously dropped out. So I wanted to do the best that I could while in the classroom and dedicate my mind, as what Elizabeth Conde Frazier would share is that my studies was my way of loving God with my mind. 

Being able to allow God to help me, learn new things. And what was interesting is that even in that process, I was able to graduate as co-valedictorian of my graduating class while at Esperanza College and then went onto Eastern University and so forth. so really like my only aspiration was to, just do things with the best of my ability.

I didn't have a clear path of what I was going to do, whether it be pastorate or you know, work in a nonprofit or anything like that. It was really I just wanted to give the best that I could in this new reset that I had and inspire hope to others, because I was in a similar situation of being without hope.

Being at Esperanza and finding hope in a new way of living, that was my aspiration. I knew for sure that all I wanted to do is inspire that to others. Uh, whether that be studying community and human resources and combining that with Bible in the future - I just wanted to inspire folks. 

Patrick: What does that form of inspiration take? Like you’re a poet, like you do all kinds of cool stuff. Like it's not just sitting around reading books about hope and inspiration and just going through it. What does that look like when you're starting to put this together? How do you spend your time? Like how do you inspire people? 

Anthony: Yeah so I do a work on music. I write hip hop, you know, in the form of rap. I use that as kind of like a platform to kind of share my life experiences with people. The way I look at it as like rap is kind of like...What we're doing is kind of an opportunity just to share in life experiences and values and allow the listeners to do what they like with that information, you know?

Yeah, I take the time just to kind of write out my experiences. You know, an inspiration from me to kind of even think about music as a way of expressing myself was Eminem when I was about 12 years old and just like listening to his music and the imagery from the words that came out from his songs - that always inspired me. And so like for me to tell a story to someone so that they could have an experiential, you know, feeling while they're listening to the song, that was always fascinating for me. And so I'm just attentional with just like words and enunciation for folks to kind of experience my story, you know, through music.

And so I spend time writing to inspire folks. Yeah, you know that regardless of what life experiences they may be feeling or experiencing at the moment, that life is like you know, it's like a book, right? And so it doesn't matter what chapter they might be in in that particular moment, that there's another chapter in their lives, you know, for the fuller purpose that God has for them.

Patrick: Any particular songs or lyrics that were like, as you're going through life and you're trying to put this down on words, that you were working through there like an expression of that moment that you're in and discerning where you're like, okay, I'm working through some stuff here.

I'm trying to put these lyrics out there. Do you have any titles as people go and listen to this podcast say, “Oh, I gotta look him up.” 

Anthony: Yeah yeah. So like, there's a song called “So Close” that I wrote last year and put out, that kind of just talks about like the journey that I had even while in…kind of pursuing my education, there was periods of times where I was like couch surfing, staying at people's homes from the church while I was finishing up my degree, saving money that ultimately I could have my own home. That was a piece that I wrote that was really close to me because it not only talks about like my experience, but then also those who, you know, poured into me while I was pursuing this active vocation, I would say. So I talk about elders who prayed for me and encouraged me to utilize gifts. That song is probably the closest to one that kind of details like my experience in this ongoing vocational journey.

Excerpt from “So Close” by A-Ram

Patrick: Wow. You work with the next generation now. You are not the next generation - you get to work with them. We're elders. [laughter] So what does that look like? What are you what are you instilling? What are you leading? What are you hoping for them? 

Anthony: Don't remind me. Yeah, so it's a variety. I work with folks, young people, that are in the church, and then also youth leaders - those that are serving young people. But my heart really is for those that came from similar backgrounds as mine, specifically young people that aren't churched. So I was able to spend a lot of time with this organization called Timoteo Sports that utilizes the platform of flag football and basketball to reach young males  between the ages of 13 and 18, as a mentorship opportunity.

Like that's my heart is because my uncle came out of prison, didn't see me and like my mess and say, well, you know, my hands off. I'm really not going to engage you because your trajectory, your actions are showing where you're going to go and you're going to be uninterested. He took the time out and he spent time with me. He, you know, he went to the supermarket, I went with him and those were moments that he was able to pour into me and answered a lot of the questions that I had. I looked at Timoteo Sports as a similar platform that I can do that with unchurched young folk, to be able to build lasting relationships with individuals.

And so that's really my heart. And then trying to encourage folks that are working in the church you know, like to be more open to the individuals that may not speak Christianese or don't fit in our particular perspective of what an individual looks like in church, but have the heart to connect with them. And so I spend a lot of my time encouraging youth in those spaces of similar places where I came from, and then also youth workers to be more mindful of that population.

Yeah. So there was one instance just like really early in my walk and just really excited about like seeing what God was doing in me and, you know, going to Bible studies and kind of hearing these truths and was really excited. So like these same individuals in my neighborhood that we would play like football in the middle of the streets, where cars are still going in between and these guys that, you know, we would just live life with. They seen me, you know, in my dark moments of coming home drunk and getting in arguments with my family and stuff like that. They saw this transformation in me and I would just spend hours like, on the steps of their house, kind of explaining things that I was excited about in the gospel and just wanted to share that with them. So much so that there was a time where, where I lived at was about a mile and a half from the church that I was going to, and we walked. There was about 30 kids that came with me and we walked to the church and they were so excited. 

There was just one particular instance where I was sitting on the steps with a couple friends and obviously just like from appearance you can tell, you know, these are guys from the neighborhood, just like me. I was a guy from the neighborhood and there was one particular church leader who came by and she saw me and she pulled me to the side - actually like right in front of them in the midst of that experience, but she pulled me to the side and she said, don't hang out with these kids too much, right? Or they're going to rub off on you. And to me, that kind of like perplexed me because, you know, literally weeks before I was in the same exact situation and my uncle came and he ministered to me. He poured into me.

And then I look at scripture and I'm like this is…I'm supposed to share this hope with everyone. And so I felt like from that moment, it kind of like catapulted me in like this journey in pursuing wanting to see God move in the margins, right?  And for whatever reason, I don't know what it was, but the church that I was a part of and just like, just observation, it seems like the institutional church was kind of like very scared to engage with folks that cuss and, you know, look different. And I was just kind of like blown away because like Jesus had no problem interacting with the stereotypes at his time. And so, that was a part of my story that I hold true to this day, because it inspired me to even more press that it is essential for me to share hope with everyone. And so, yeah, I wanted to share that.

Patrick: If someone's trying to figure out what you do, what is it that you do for a living? This is, I think, everyone's dream to be able to do all the things that you just named, but what does that look like on a on a day-to-day level? Like yeah, what do you do? 

Anthony: Yeah so yeah, you know, it's really exciting. So I'm a project director at Esperanza in Philadelphia - a large, community development organization that focuses on education, immigration legal services, business development. And then what our department focuses on is specifically capacity building. We've done that for a number of years with mentoring organizations, helping them at the grassroots level to develop their board, their 501c3 and funding subawards and so forth. But we've shifted in the past six years to serve pastors, youth leaders of congregations - we help build their capacity.

There's a cohort element where we bring in groups from different parts of the region and they learn together either for a year or two-year periods. And then obviously make grants available for their development, whether it be for outreach projects or capacity building. So yeah, so it has different cycles in which the programs run. In addition to that, you know, serving as a mentor with the organization I mentioned earlier and then write music. So yeah, that's what I get to do. And then I do some teaching. I'm an adjunct professor at Esperanza College teaching faith values of Eastern University, which is faith, reason and justice. And then Bible 100. 

Patrick: That's what's up! That's so cool. I ask everyone who comes to the show, this is the last question - as I think about or just heard your story, and going back to your grandma, your mom…who fired you, I'm kidding - Pastor Alvarez. You got Elizabeth Conde-Frazier, all these great women, mentors, folks in your life, your uncle, who let you accompany them. How much of your own vocation comes from that community? That group of folks who have poured into you and loved you and how much comes from something that's in you? Like you got lyrics in you that need to get out! You know, you gotta put down on paper, you gotta record them. Like how much is it your own sense of self or connection with the divine? 

Anthony: Yeah, that's a great question. I think they gave me, they meaning my mother, my grandmother, pastor Alvarez, and then also just the many individuals that poured into me - they're in my walk, Elizabeth Conde-Frazier…I can name a bunch of folks, many folks that just gave me the opportunity to bounce ideas.

I had the privilege really to just kind of be creative and, you know, create small little mentoring programs in our church where we paired elders and youth leaders with young people. Created a small little group called Man Up where guys from 12 all the way to 21 would meet each other every other Saturday and kind of demonstrated what Acts 2:42 was, like breaking bread with one another praying with each other, getting into the scriptures, right? They were like a whiteboard to kind of cast ideas and encourage me, gave me the space to be creative and obviously learn from what worked and what didn't work.

Yeah, and I think for sure that that were inspirations that came as a direct result from just like my relationship and pursuit of God. And just as you mentioned, like even just like lyrics and music, like there was a point in time when I first came to the faith that I didn't think I could even bring this gift into the church because it was, at least from my tradition as a young male Pentecostal, like this art platform was looked at as worldly, right? I remember the first time I shared a verse that was more of just like a testimonial, thanking God for what he did in my life. And my older sister, she heard it. My uncle heard it and they both began to cry and they were like, there's space for you for this, you know?

Yeah. So it's really a combination of the two where those folks gave me the space to be creative and just bounce ideas and then just the inspiration from the beginning that I think was a result for my relationship with God and just pursuing him to even think up these ideas or lyrics or these opportunities to connect with folks and things like that. 

Patrick: That’s amazing. Anthony, I'm so grateful for this interview to be able to sit down and talk with you man. I love you. And just, I mean, all of this stuff, I can't wait to listen to more music. That's so cool man. Thank you.

Thank you for listening to the Sound of the Genuine and Anthony Ramos's story. Here at FTE we want you to find the sound of the genuine in you. So my invitation for you is to head on over to our website, www.fteleaders.org and check out the many resources we have to help you do that. So as I thank my team, Elsie Barnhart and Heather Wallace, for producing this story, A-Ram is going to lead us out with some of his music. Thanks again for listening to the Sound of the Genuine.